Mother’s Day

In the Qur’an, the declaration to respect your parents comes right after the command to obey God. This verdict is repeated seven times in the same order. And the famous Hadith of the Prophet (pbuh) about the position of mother when he told a companion three times to “serve your mother” before saying “serve your father” is a household word.

In many countries and cultures, a special day is set aside for recognizing mothers.
Children prepare breakfast for the Mom and bring it to her bed. Some kids give mothers blank cheques for different chores that they would do for them on demand. Grown up kids bring mothers flowers or gifts, take them out for a lavish lunch or dinner and hence express their love and admiration for that most respected woman.

Islam encourages expressing love to people in our life. The more important the person, the deeper the love is.

May 11th is the Mother’s Day in Canada this year (2008). I have some suggestions regarding how to celebrate this day.

This Mother’s Day, treat your mother with your love, respect and kindness for a few hours. And then make it a habit.

If she is alive, spend time with her. Rub her feet; your Jannah lies under her feet. Ask for her forgiveness for anything that you have done to hurt her feelings, whether knowingly or unknowingly; she may not be around the next year.

Make a pledge to yourself that you’ll never talk back to her -- it breaks her heart.
Handle her as if she is a priceless piece of crystal; once gone, it’s gone forever. She may be hard on you sometimes, but you had been very, very hard on her a lot of times.
Talk to her with a smile on your face; keep your frowns away.

Sometimes it’s not your words but the tone of your voice that tells her that you are irritated with her. Avoid that tone and always be patient and polite with her, even when she really annoys you.

Never discredit her opinion right out. Don’t forget, no matter how old you get, you are still her “baby.” Obviously you don’t want her to run your life, but be tactful, not blunt.
Take pride in being obedient to your mother, even in front of your friends; if they are really your friends, they will appreciate it. If they don’t, they don’t deserve your company.

It’s nice to bring her flowers or a gift, but more than that, it’s your TIME that she yearns for. If she lives away from you, make sure to keep in touch as much as you can. She never gets bored of hearing your voice.

Ask her to make Dua’ for you as her supplication goes straight to the heaven and Allah answers a mother’s prayers for her child more than anyone else’s.

If she is not in this world to make dua’ for you, send her the best gift that you can ever give her: Recite some Qur’an and make a dua FOR her. Feed some poor people on her behalf, clothe someone who can not afford to do that, or give some money in charity in her name.

The best charity is the one that continues for a long time, also called Sadiqa-e-Jariah. Find out about the projects that satisfy this need and give some sadaqa for her. It does not have to be a million dollars; even ten dollars suffice, since Allah knows the intentions and rewards accordingly.

If she had not performed Hajj in her life and you can afford to do that, make a Hajj-ul-badal for her.

Ask Allah to forgive her sins, grant her the best place in the paradise and bless her soul with peace.

After doing all this and more, you still won’t be able to pay her back for what she had done for you.

She carried you inside her body for nine long months while suffering a lot of discomfort, went through the pains of labour, nursed (or bottle-fed) you every time you were hungry, took care of you while working for money, bore with your demands, put up with your attitude, listened to your complaints about the unfairness of life and more.

She kissed your hurts away and gave you the confidence that you can face the whole world.

She smiled with you and cried with you. She saw you growing big and strong while herself sliding into old age and fragility, prayed for your long life while ready to give her own life for you, and tried to even leave you with some inheritance when she passed away.

In her dreams she saw you as an adult -- accomplished and influential. She saw you grow from a little weak seedling into a strong tree. Trying to nurture you in the best possible way, she sacrificed her today for your tomorrow.

Yes, this is YOUR mother. This is MY mother: The woman who deserves our salute!!

Asma Warsi