As the story about the creation of man goes, the Qur’an mentions that when Allah (God) declared it to the angels that He is going to make a being called human, they humbly asked Him why He was going to create something that will bring bloodshed on the earth? And Allah replied, “I know what you don’t.”
This story hints towards the violent character of mankind; that it is intrinsically entrenched in his nature to be aggressive, cruel and vicious.
There is no other specie in the animal kingdom that would kill another of its kind without a dire need, like hunger or fear. And even then, they don’t take pleasure in torturing their prey. They just kill, eat and go about doing their business.
Man has the special honour of being the most excellent of all the creations but he can also be the most evil one.
He could be scared to death of the aliens and beasts, and yet would not shy of violence against his own kind, the ones that are weaker than him.
Take for example the male violence against the female kind. Men, in general, are physically stronger than women. So if and when they see the need, they abuse the same woman that they claim to love! This abuse can be in different shapes and forms. It can be mentally and psychologically belittling her, emotionally scarring her, or physically hurting her.
Their own offspring are not protected from their wrath and sometimes it results in the killing of a female family member. In the olden days, in the days of Jahilia (ignorance, before Islam), fathers used to burry the female child alive; killings are still going on today -- sometimes in the name of religion (as in burning the wife on her husband’s pyre,) sometimes in the name of the honour of the family, sometimes as a punishment for not bringing enough dowry and sometimes just for getting even for or during an argument.
Violence against elders is not an unheard phenomenon. Actually it is on the rise even in the so called ‘civilized’ societies. Financially unstable parents who have to live with their grown up children will, in many cases, testify to this statement. Stories of children forcefully taking their parents’ pension cheques, leaving them in substandard conditions at homes, not taking care of them, subjecting elderly parents unduly to work like a slave at home, while themselves going about spending and having a good time, all this comes under abuse. Refusal to obedience from parents could often result in disrespectful verbal, even corporal punishment.
As a community, violence against poor is very common in third world countries. An otherwise weak but rich man can bring hell to a strong but poor fellow and his family. The poor can be beaten to death, the female members of his family humiliated and children subjected to unbearable torture, for any action alleged by the rich as unacceptable.
Violence is committed against a race perceived as inferior by another race. This violence has led to slavery of a whole people, depriving them of their language, culture, religion, and their self-worth.
Strong countries invade weaker ones and commit all kinds of atrocities. It’s violence against nations.
What is the cause of all this violence? If I were a social scientist, I would probably analyze human mind; talk about nature versus nurture; the cycle of violence, and the likes. But I am not one. The only thing I know is that we CHOOSE to be violent.
And the reason for my argument is that we are selective in our violent behaviour. We don’t strike someone stronger than us (because we know the consequences!) Our fierceness is limited to the ones who can not hit back; who are inferior to us in some way or the other. And that is because man is also a very clever animal. If we don’t anticipate an equal response, we become audacious in our actions. We start getting a kick out of humiliating others. The absence of accountability for our actions strengthens our superiority complex and arrogance.
And arrogance brings us in the company of Iblees (Satan), the cursed one.
We probably can not help the whole humanity, but to eradicate violence from our families, we need two-pronged remedy: One for the perpetrator, the other for the victim. As Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) has said: “You must help both; the one who has been wronged-against and the wrong-doer – help one by empowering him and the other by stopping him from committing wrong.”
We have to empower the weak elements with legal and community support, financial independence, and at the same time spiritual training.
The stronger elements should be made more accountable by the law, public pressure, open condemnation, and, of course, with spiritual training.
The task is not easy. But Rome was not built in one day.
Asma Warsi
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Good Morning Madam,
ReplyDeleteI really like your topic on Social Matters.
We have just had a horrendous example of man's inhumanity to man, in the killing of the children at the Day Care in Belgium. Innocents have been slaughtered.
Men who do violence against women and children,in my opinion, are cowards. They sure wouldn't do it against another man!
Your comments regards violence against elders is also true. Having worked for 4 1/2 years here in Hamilton as a Senior Peer Councillor, I can attest to what you say, in particular to having pension cheques taken. Also, the elderly are more trusting due to the times they were brought up in, and sometimes fall victims to con artists who specifically target them.
I totally agree with you that mankind chooses to be abusive. Many abusers hurt their partners, then tell them they will never do it again. Well, unless their behaviour is modified and they get counselling, they will do it again and again....
I have spoken to a friend who is a councillor for males who abuse, and the interesting thing is that it is never the fault of the abuser, but the abused one has brought it upon themselves. He told me that this is the attitude of the abuser. I can believe that!
Until the abusive person,like the alcoholic, admits that they are wrong and need help, then that behaviour cannot be modified and the partner is in danger.
After working as a volunteer for over a year in a shelter for abused women and children in Toronto, I have seen the devastation caused by abusive behaviour.
I remember one Egyptian lady (elderly) who had been repeated abused by her husband over the years. She was a Coptic Christian and her family was very upset that she had gone to the shelter as it brought shame on the family.They were not thinking of their mother at all.
I had a friend at work whose relative called the police on her husband when he hurt her. My friend, who is an Indian Christian, felt that she did the wrong thing. I could not disagree more.
I recall another case where a West Indian lady thought her husband was at work, went back alone to her apartment to get some clothes and he was home and killed her.
No person has the right to abuse another, whether male or female!
Both the abuser and the one abused need support, the abuser to understand why he/she resorts to violence and to get the help he/she needs to change this behaviour, and the abused one to cope with the damage done to themselves, both emotionally, physically and spiritually.
Many women stay in bad relationships when they shouldn't.
That's my two cents worth!
Thank you dear. Violence not only hurts physically and mentally, but erodes your intellectual capacity too, by belittling you and acusing oyou of all the evils.
ReplyDeleteI wish more people learn about it and bring the change that they should and they deserve.